Listen for something new

What you listen for when you interact with your spouse, child, coworker, boss, friend… depends on what you think about them. The conclusions and stories you have about others (and yourself) determine what you look for and listen for in your interactions with them. You will look for and listen for things that verify your [...]

Focus on what you want and what is most important

Have you noticed how people are often focused on what they DON’T want in their relationships?
“I don’t want to worry about my children so much…”
“I don’t want my boss to be so controlling…”
“I don’t want to feel so lousy about myself any more…”
“I don’t want to keep how I really feel locked up inside of [...]

Look for the BEST in yourself and others

Here’s one of the quickest and most powerful ways to dramatically improve the quality and health of any relationship:
Look for the best in yourself, others, and the relationship and share what you learn by expressing sincere appreciation.
The power of appreciation is one of the most underutilized powers in relationships. Appreciation is good for the soul [...]

Are conflicts essential for healthy relationships?

Conflicts are essential to the health of a relationship. For example, in a marriage it has been said that if you aren’t having healthy conflicts with your marital partner, then your marriage is either dead or dying. That’s a rather powerful statement.
If you’re like me, you may have a personality that is conflict adverse. In [...]